3 Secrets to beat the stress of PCS

By Ann Medlin & Leslie Lefebvre

Secret #1: Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff

Ann Medlin:  Military Spouse, HH6 Camo Chix Founder and Chief Blogger

Ann is a seasoned military wife who has made it her mission to share what she knows and to offer her support to other military families, especially those new to military life.  She knows only too well what it is like to move every couple of years, make new friends, help the kids adjust to a new school and community, and reinvent herself professionally.

Ann Writes:

Packing up and moving every few years is a way of life for military families. Moving is stressful, there is no doubt about it, and one of the biggest causes of stress is not having access to something you need because it’s with the rest of your household goods that haven’t arrived yet,  in a box that wasn’t marked correctly, or (and this can really cause stress) you realize that something you really need or cherish may have been lost or left behind.

I think I was meant to be a military spouse. It’s as if my life leading up to meeting my soldier was preparing me for this life.   I truly believe that things happen for a reason. 

The year I was a freshman in college, the home I grew up in burned to the ground on Thanksgiving morning. I lost everything except the clothes on my back and the Nike sweat suit in my gym bag that was still in my car. To say that it was devastating is an understatement, but thank GOD, nobody was hurt.

My best friend since kindergarten showed up later that morning to be with me. She sat alongside me, both of us crying, as we watched the firemen work — it was surreal.

Even in the middle of us bawling — watching all those memories go up in smoke — my best friend found a way to help me deal with it the best way she knew how, by finding a way to make me smile.

She poked me and just started singing the “The roof, The roof, The roof is on fire.”

I looked at her, still crying, but couldn’t help laughing too. There was no humor in the situation, but somehow the stress began to ease up and I knew it was going to be OK. In that moment I realized that the stuff could be replaced, and that what we still had — our lives, our family, our friends — was priceless.

I lost everything in that fire, and there was no way of replacing all I had lost. Sometimes you are able to comb through ashes and find things, no not this fire. It was heart wrenching.

I had no idea at the time, but that moment was preparing my heart for the life of a military spouse.

I mean, I hate ironing…who knew that my prince charming would wear camo and jump boots and know how to iron better than I ever could?  How God paves the way and prepares our hearts for what we do not even realize we’ll face years later.

A year after the fire, all my friends thought I had lost my mind when I said I was up and moving to Hawaii, but my American hero was stationed there at the time, so I packed up all my clothes in three suitcases (prior to that fire it would have taken a cargo plane to transport my clothes across the Pacific) and I was Aloha-bound. I had no qualms about leaving because I had learned that home is not an address — home truly  is where your heart is.

We have moved now more times than I can count on both my hands, but after having lost everything,  it’s just never been a problem for me to wrap my mind around a few moving trucks showing up to pack my belonging’s and ship them to wherever the military was sending us next.

Please don’t get me wrong I cherish my things.  I hate unpacking and finding things broken, but I do not stress it because things can be replaced. It may not be what you had, but it will work.

Do things get lost or destroyed during a move? Sure, it happens, but guess what? As long as you and your family are healthy and safe, that’s all that matters. If something is broken, stolen or lost they will fix it or reimburse me for it — maybe not the full amount, but it’s enough.

I have an advantage over my civilian friends because I get a new “recycled” house every few years. By the time we retire, I will know exactly what I am looking for in a home because I have lived in so many “recycled “homes with different floor plans. Moving is a great time to get rid of things you have not used over the past couple of years.

The truth is,  I know I can make anywhere home as long as I have what matters. My family.

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