With every move comes the pressure of adapting to a new environment and routine. Coupled with the stress that comes with starting a new job or going to a new school, the emotional aftermath of a move can leave you, your spouse, or your child longing for the familiar faces of family and friends left behind. While none of us is immune to homesickness, if we understand its triggers we can — in most cases — take steps to minimize or even prevent it.
Understanding the Causes of Homesickness
In his August 2010 CNN article, Homesickness isn’t Really About ‘Home,’ author Derrick Ho explores the causes behind this common — and occasionally debilitating — condition.
People have been feeling homesick since biblical times, Ho writes, adding that anyone can feel homesick in a new place, even actors and sports stars. To understand its cause, Ho turns to clinical psychologist Josh Klapow, associate professor of the University of Alabama’s School of Public Health, who explains that homesickness is triggered by our need to feel loved, protected and safe — things we associate with home, Klapow explains. When these qualities and feelings are missing from our new environment,” according to Klapow, we long for them — and therefor, home.
“You’re not literally just missing your house,” according to Klapow, “You’re missing what’s normal, what is routine, the larger sense of social space, because those are the things that help us survive.”
“It’s normal and adaptive to feel homesick for some period of time,” Klapow says, adding “It’s just your emotions and mind telling you you’re out of your element.”
Tips for Dealing with Homesickness
1. Get Involved: Volunteer for a committee or community service project at work, take a class or join a local team in your community, participate as a family in activities at your kids’ schools.
2. Create the “New” Normal: Establish a routine that incorporates the familiar that doesn’t change (bedtime routine, mealtimes, chores, homework time, favorite television shows) with familiar activities adapted to your new environment (date night, family outings, attending sporting events, attending religious services).
3. Stay Connected with Family: Hang photos, leave out picture albums, call or connect via social media, write letters and send invitations to come visit.
4. Comfort Food: Make a familiar meal, ask a family member for the recipe to a favorite dish, go out for ice cream and get your favorite flavor, bake your favorite dessert to share with your coworkers
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